


who you become (on the outside)

by Elindae



Category: Tales of Arcadia (Cartoons), Trollhunters - Daniel Kraus & Guillermo del Toro
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Daemons, Angst, Daemons, Troll Jim Lake Jr.
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-06
Updated: 2019-03-06
Packaged: 2019-11-12 15:33:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,221
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18013556
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Elindae/pseuds/Elindae
Summary: Jim does not know what his daemon is. Many of his friends know what their daemons are, these shining creatures of pure light, representations of who you truly are on the inside brought outside.Jim does not know what his daemon is. He won't like the answer.





	who you become (on the outside)

Jim does not know what his daemon is. He’d hoped that it would be something adventurous, a whirling figure of light in the shape of something exciting and new and wild and a representation of everything he'd ever needed in his life.

For a few moments here and there, he’d thought he’d seen it—-when he was riding to school with Toby, the rising sun hot on his back, laughing and whirling around on their bikes—-he’d thought he’d seen a flicker of light, and then it was gone.

Or the time he got to test ride a Vespa, sleek and bright red and so, so, so fast. He was driving down the road, the wind howling in his ears, the trees weaving above, and he swore he saw something bounding by on fast legs before disappearing into the next bend around the road.

There was the time he was in class and talked to Claire. (Claire, perfect claire, who deserved the best) And there was the time he was in the schoolyard, Steve sprawled out on the ground with wide eyes, Jim’s fist screwed up tightly beside him. And then there was that time in the garden, when the setting sun was shining brightly and he brought some of that sunlight forth in the shape of a sword, shining armor covering his body—-and he thought he’d seen it. A flicker of light, a glowing shape, and he always looked to see what was there. 

(and saw nothing every time)

He remembered his daemon. The other James's daemon, that is.

Back when he was too young to understand what a daemon was, but old enough to think that your father was the best thing in the world. He remembered a dog, wisps of light curled around her dark fur, her brown eyes staring at him from across the room. He remembered how kind she was, how she had always happily looked at him, how soft she had looked, and how he never got to touch her. Ever.

There was James Lake Senior in the doorway, a wide smile on his face, the glittering parts of a Vespa strewn across the floor, and there was that dog again—-except she wasn’t kind, she was bright eyed and distant and ignoring him, and she didn’t stop to look at him once as James walked out the doorway with his daemon.

And then the door had swung shut.

Jim winced at the memory. He grunted as the sword slipped out of his hands. It fell to the floor of the Hero’s Forge and clattered against the ground before dissolving in a whirl of blue light. There was something glowing at the edge of his vision, a bright point of light, a glowing shape—-

He looked at it, and he saw it flicker and flash before fading away.

Jim sighed and his shoulders fell. A hand clapped itself around his shoulder and he turned and looked into Blinky’s eyes.

“Worry not, Master Jim. I’m sure you’ll figure out what your daemon is someday.”

Jim forced a smile and thought of a dog, bright-eyed and warm. “I hope so too.”

.

.

.

Toby knows what his daemon is. 

The light of the old TV had lit up the dusty room and reflected across the gaming controller in his hand. Aaaarrrgh laughed beside him, a game controller in the palm of his own hand, his other hand pressing the buttons and twirling the joystick around.

A deep rumble of satisfaction boomed out into the air as the word VICTORY flashed across the screen, little pictures of sushi bouncing around the word.

“You did great, wingman!” Toby said, laughing as he fist bumped Aaaarrrgh. Aaaarrrgh smiled and the blanket around his furry shoulders slipped a bit, drawing to the side.

“Play again?” Aaaarrrgh rumbled, his deep purr vibrating through the floorboards.

“Of course! Those chefs just can’t get enough of our help.” Toby said, pressing a few buttons and restarting the game. The TV screen flashed as the game restarted, sushi falling down, and something hidden beside Aaaargh’s blanket flashed as well.

Aaaargh grumbled in surprise and looked down, blinking at something. “Wingman?” he said, slowly and carefully.

“Whatcha got there, bud?” Tobias said as he scooted over to Aaaarrrgh’s blanket, drawing it aside.

A dog sat there with bright golden fur and wide green eyes, her tail wagging beside her. She glowed brightly and green particles of light sparkled around her.

“Oh, Aaaarrrgh! It’s my daemon!” Tobias laughed as the dog jumped around, running circles around the floor and over Aaaarrrgh.

Aaaarrrgh laughed, deep and happy, and the dog laughed as well, a deep bark booming out of her.

“I can’t believe I found you,” Toby laughed as she bounded into his arms. She was all soft and warm and so very, very happy. “I finally found you.”

.

.

.

Claire remembers when she found her daemon.

She clutched the shadowstaff tightly in her hand and felt the thrum of something old and ancient. The air smelled of chlorine as wisps of purple magic whirled around her, burning through the air and flashing violet.

Someone had yelled in the distance—-A Gumm-Gumm, another citizen of Trollmarket, another victim?—-she didn’t know. Trolls huddled around her, the air thick with their heaving breaths and the smell of spilt blood.

She clutched the shadowstaff tightly. Jim was beside her, looking worried, the violet magic flashing in his blue eyes. She knew that she was the center of attention, that all eyes were on her, that if she failed—-

No. Claire clutched the shadowstaff tightly, hoisted it up, and created the biggest portal she had ever made.

Her eyes stung as the blindingly bright magic fed itself into the growing void above their heads, the Gumm-Gumms were growing louder, and the anxious crowd shifted again, and the portal flickered and flared and it—-was not enough.

Jim placed his hand on the shadowstaff. The whirling violet lights whipped around the two of them, his face looking back at her through the blinding magic. 

Blinky put his hand on the shadowstaff. Then Aaarrrgghh and Toby and—-

The portal grew larger again.

The rampaging Gumm-Gumms got louder and louder, their heavy fists banging against the steel doors of the gyre station and their unearthly howls drifting through. The trolls around her shuffled nervously, their eyes locked onto the enormous portal forming above their heads.

Claire clutched the shadowstaff tightly, Angor Rot’s laughter ringing in the distance—-

And she fell onto the cement.

She looked up. The sun shone out from the other end of the stone tunnel, green trees weaving in the wind beyond. A hundred trolls gathered around her, stumbling out of the portal and out into the crowded tunnel.

“Claire!” someone was shouting. Jim’s face came into view, his bright blue eyes scanning her over. Something purple flashed behind him.

“Did… I do it?” she gasped out and Jim nodded, holding her in his arms.

“You did it, Claire, you did it.” Jim laughed, his voice watery.

Something glowed a bright purple beside her. She weakly looked over and saw a cat curled up by her side, glowing a faint violet.

“Oh, Claire, you—-you found your daemon!” Jim shouted, the glowing cat lifting its head and meowing at him.

Claire froze. The cat padded over to her and blinked, its purple eyes steadily watching her.

“Oh. Oh.” Claire said, weak and shaking as she took the glowing cat into her arms. She smiled as she petted the cat, the little kitten meowing and purring, shining a bright violet.

Jim flinched, a tight smile on his face.

.

.

.

Steve Palchuk did not need a daemon. He was his own daemon. Heck, he should be other people’s daemons—-except that would be impossible, because the only person strong enough and worthy enough of having Steve Palchuk as a daemon would be Steve Palchuk himself.

So he says.

But there he was, sprawled out on the museum floor, alarms blaring and red lights flashing, and he looked over at Eli, all noodly and pale and weak and thought—-

Ah.

(strong enough, worthy enough)

“We are…” Eli said, a smile on his face as he weakly lifted a fist. Steve lifted his own fist and bumped it against Eli’s as a siren wailed in the distance, “...the Creepslayerz.”

Steve laughed and for a split moment, he didn’t see Eli the nerd, or Eli the weak, or Eli, that-one-kid-who-fits-surprisingly-well-into-a-school-locker, he saw Eli, his friend. 

He saw someone who was worthy.

Something behind one of the museum displays shone a bright red.

“Eli, look!” he shouted, bringing up his fists.

“It’s not back, is it? We don’t have more flour! We’re out of children to sacrifice!” Eli shouted, jumping to his feet.

“What—-? Eli, no, I think…”

The mysterious glow behind the display case flared brightly and shifted around. 

A hawk flew out from behind the case, shining a brilliant red and leaving plumes of crimson light in her wake. It circled through the air before landing on Steve’s shoulder, staring at him with her piercing eyes.

“Uh.” Steve said.

“Oh my gosh, you did it, fellow Creepslayer! You found your daemon!” Eli squealed, running around and looking at the glowing hawk with wide eyes.

Steve blinked and stared at his daemon. The glowing hawk blinked back at him before taking to the air again, this time settling on Eli’s shoulder. Eli yelped and began to talk way too quickly for Steve to understand.

"She’s so cool—-and shes a red hawk, they’re very strong oh-my-god-this-is-so-cool, I have a new friend—-"

I have a new friend.

Steve wrapped an arm around Eli as his daemon went to the air again, flying above their heads in lazy circles. “Oh yeah, Eli! The Creepslayerz just got a new member!”

“She’ll help us out a lot! Hawks are very protective of those that they like.”

“Is that so?” Steve mumbled, pulling Eli closer.

.

.

.

Jim remembered the roof. He had been young, very young, and Toby had been younger, and they were playing around on the school's roof. He didn’t really remember why they were on the roof or what they were playing with—-little toy Vespas, that was it—-but what he really remembered was the sun high above, flashing across the glossy paint of their toys and shining across leaves of the trees in the school courtyard far below.

He remembered looking over the edge of the roof and at the school below, at the trees and the bike racks, and he remembers naming every building and calling out which ones were which. He remembered Toby boasting about how they’d practically lived in the school, and he remembered how Toby had flopped down onto the concrete beside him, the sun high above, and how he’d said “When we’ll graduate—-”

He did not remember very well what Toby had said next. Toby had talked about what they’d do when they got their diplomas and when they raced out into the world, and the places they’d go and the awesome jobs they’d get. Jim had wanted to be a chef.

“When we’ll graduate—-”

Jim looked over the edge of the roof and at the school below. The sun was gone and the night was dark, a thousand stars shining brightly above him. It’s the closest he’ll ever get to being in the sun again.

He looked over at the edge of the roof and at the trees and the bike racks. He lifted a four-fingered hand and pointed out all the buildings, quietly whispering their names to himself, the wind blowing past him and curling over his horns.

“When we’ll graduate—-”

Jim looked down at the Eclipse armor covering his body and at the way the moonlight reflected off of its sharp curves. It glowed a bright red in the night, the red light spilling out like blood all over the rooftop.

“When we’ll graduate—-”

Toby’s words continued to float through his head, a dreamy confession made under the sun years ago. Jim snarled suddenly, and then winced. He felt the tips of his fangs poking out from his mouth and felt the amulet burning in his chest. His horns weighed his head down and he felt like a great weight was suddenly pushing down on his shoulders, weighing him down.

Something glowed brightly behind him. 

Something behind him glowed a bright electric blue, making Jim cast a horned shadow onto the rooftop. Wisps of blue light floated through the air and curled around him, his body tingling with anticipation as he felt something shift behind him.

Jim’s eyes shot wide open. He took a deep breath, and turned around and looked at his daemon. He turned around, and came face to face with—-

Himself.

Jim Lake. Jr stood in front of him, glowing a bright blue, wisps of light flaring out from him. Jim knew the face of his daemon, he’d seen it every time he had looked in the mirror. He remembered walking up to the mirror above the sink in the bathroom and clearing away the fog, memorizing his features before he submerged himself into Merlin’s potion, he remembered the look on his face before he gave it up.

Jim stared at his daemon.

And human Jim stared right back.


End file.
